Why Bush Went to War

Mark Tran writes in The Guardian Blog

One of the more Machiavellian justifications for invading Iraq was the flypaper theory. Invading and occupying Iraq might turn the country into a magnet for anti-US terrorists, the argument went, but it was better to slug it out in a distant and foreign land instead of closer to home.

The post goes on to cite a CIA assessment turning the theory on it's head, saying Iraq might actually prove to be an effective training ground for terrorists, in urban combat.

Given George Bush's frustration with that foreign policy stuff, I doubt we have to look too far beyond his earthy pronouncements to formulate theories about why he went to war.

The Dogs of War Theory
We cannot let terriers and rogue nations hold this nation hostile (sic) or hold our allies hostile (sick).

The Identify Foe or Foe Theory
When I was coming up, it was a dangerous world, and you knew exactly who they were. It was us vs. them, and it was clear who them was. Today, we are not so sure who the they are, but we know they're there.

The Recursive War Theory
The mission must be to fight and win war and therefore to prevent war from happening in the first place.

The For Your Own Safety Theory
Iraq has—have got people there that are willing to kill, and they're hard-nosed killers. And we will work with the Iraqis to secure their future.

It's in our country's interests to find those who would do harm to us and get them out of harm's way.

The Oceans Couldn't Keep Us Apart Theory
We thought we were protected forever from trade policy or terrorist attacks because oceans protected us.

The Hat-Felt Theory
Free societies will be allies against these hateful few who have no conscience, who kill at the whim of a hat.

The New Commandment Theory
Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.

The Peace, Freedom and Justice Theory
The ambassador and the general were briefing me on the—the vast majority of Iraqis want to live in a peaceful, free world. And we will find these people and we will bring them to justice.

The Narcissus Theory
The war on terror involves Saddam Hussein because of the nature of Saddam Hussein, the history of Saddam Hussein, and his willingness to terrorize himself.

The Tough Times Last Theory
There may be some tough times here in America. But this country has gone through tough times before, and we're going to do it again.

I also have a sneaking suspicion that his wife might have to share some blame :

The Satisfied Housewife Theory
I said to him the other day, "George, if you really want to end tyranny in the world, you're going to have to stay up later." Nine o'clock, Mr. Excitement here is sound asleep, and I'm watching Desperate Housewives— with Lynne Cheney. Ladies and gentlemen, I am a desperate housewife.

Laura Bush, in an address to the White House Correspondents' Association.

Slate hosts a frequently updated page on Bush's pronouncements, and so does Bushisms.com

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